My third session we have a bit of trouble with the emWave (I will refer to it as HeartMath from now on. It sounds kind of lovely…HeartMath), so she attaches the sensor to my ear lobe instead of my middle finger. It seems to be a more stable connection for me. Although I do stay quite still, I think my finger wiggles out of the sensor unbeknownst to me.
I am not getting out of the lower coherence range today. I try to think of beautiful places, people and things to no avail. I try different things to manipulate the process, like breathing harder or faster. I try holding my breath at the end of the out breath or the end of the in breath and sometimes it changes, but not enough to stay consistent. I try to recreate my excitement over my conversation about Temple Grandin, but that doesn’t work either. Dr. Eissler reassures me and says “It is what it is.”
After the neurofeedback sensors are fitted, Moulin Rouge progresses. My scores are similar to the first session and I am told that this is all part of the process. It takes time to see and feel the changes that are occurring, around six or seven visits. It makes sense and so I anticipate, as patiently as I am able to, my next session…